Death jokes
How did they know that Princess Diana had dandruff?
They found her Head and Shoulders in the glove box.
Someone on here said it previously:
My fondest childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather. That is until my mom took the urn away from me.
He went too far away from the wall, and he got unplugged.
Stephen Hawking is ALIVE!
How Stephen Hawking died: he drove too far away from the wall and the cord got unplugged.
He died because he rolled too far away from the wall outlet and got unplugged.
What's the difference between 13 dead babies and a skeleton?
There aren't any, there's 13 skeletons in my closet.
How did Sally die?
She got shot.
How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road and didn't make it.
Stephen Hawking didn't die, he got sucked up by the black hole then got sent to the large charger in the sky.
So Timmy was walking down the street with his friend Lea. Suddenly a car drives by and Timmy waves at the car.
Lea looks at him, puzzled, then later asks him; "Why'd you wave at that car back there?"
Timmy replies "Oh that was my brother, he went to the bar. He must just be driving home..."
My grandpa died to ligma :(
LIGMA BALLS!
I'm glad Stephen Hawking died because he was wheely wheely bad.
What was the last thing to go through Princess Diana’s head before she died?
The steering wheel.
What did one casket say to the other casket?
"Is that you coughin'?"
My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death. I clearly asked for Jammy Dodgers and got Bourbons!
My gardener found a dead body. Of the old gardener!
How's George Floyd doing these days? Being drug-free for a year, he must be feeling pretty swell.
My sister: See you at home in about an hour.
Me: Okay.
My sister: Sister, where are you? *She looks out the window.*
Me: Sis, I'm here, can't you see me?
Sister: OMG, she's dead!
Me: Yeah, I know, but can't you see me?
My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0
This is not a joke; this is just about death...