Death jokes

Why can't my grandma talk?

Because she's dead.

How's George Floyd doing these days? Being drug-free for a year, he must be feeling pretty swell.

My gardener found a dead body. Of the old gardener!

I still remember my dad's last words, "You c***! You let the ladder go, you cuuunt!"

Smack! He hit the ground and bled out.

What does "off-limits" have in common with dead people? They can’t see their family.

Let's stop this, it's not funny. Oh wait, the orphans are all gone with nobody. 😂

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

What do dead people and orphans have in common? They can't see their family.

What did one casket say to the other casket?

"Is that you coughin'?"

My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death. I clearly asked for Jammy Dodgers and got Bourbons!

My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0

This is not a joke; this is just about death...

Did you hear about the midget who was beaten to death playing volleyball at a nudist colony?

Why did the orphan kill himself?

How do you break an orphan's wall in their room in the orphanage?

Tell them to put a tally on the wall with a pen for every second their parents are missing.

Why did Stephen die so early?

He didn't use long lasting batteries.

Life's a bitch, and then you die. I now see what they mean.

The doctor gave his patient 1 day of life, so he shot him. Then the judge gave him 15 years, so there you go, problem solved.

Little Johnny likes to play with toy guns.

Little Johnny paints them black.

Little Johnny went to a gun store.

Little Johnny made a big mess.

The cemetery people were getting paid.

If you had a friend like me, would you kill me?

“Wills”

Are they a dead giveaway!