Death

Death jokes

Sister

My sister: See you at home in about an hour.

Me: Okay.

My sister: Sister, where are you? *She looks out the window.*

Me: Sis, I'm here, can't you see me?

Sister: OMG, she's dead!

Me: Yeah, I know, but can't you see me?

Virus

One random YouTube comment in 2018: "Soon, a virus will come to Earth."

A year later: "Pahahahahah that comment is fake lmaoooo ahahahha!"

Another year later: "Time to die a painful death."

Another year later: "God has come with the cure!"

Word

What were Stephen Hawking's last words?

Error, error, error.

System shutting down.

Education

If I worked for Edexcel, I'd give Caroline Flack an A* for her physics experiment.

Eyeball

What body part takes the longest to decay? The eyeball, because it will always dilate.

Axe

I remember my grandma's last words:

"What are you doing with that axe?"