Death jokes
What do you call an animal in space? Just death because you need a spacesuit.
To start off this Christmas season, I'ma make a list of what I want, then I'ma make plans with my family, then to start off my decorations, I'ma start with the first ornament and hang myself.
My friend told me to "hang on" when I told him I wanted to kill myself.
Buddy, I’ll be hanging for sure, just you wait.
I was on the Oregon trail with my friend's brother, Carl. He got cholera, so we threw him off the wagon. When we came back, he was having a seizure and pooping uncontrollably. It was pretty cholerious.
My grandma always loved to craft clothing. She dyed last week.
Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.
It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.
Are you with Alex?
Fucking retarded. Go dig a home die, people!
Why did the man get run over?
Ur mom XD
Want to know what Juice WRLD would do if he were alive today?
Frantically scratch on the inside of his coffin.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He ran out of battery life.
Why did Stephen Hawking die so soon?
Because his misses bought the wrong batteries.
I heard this was a really popular funeral home. People are dying to get in.
How many thots have I bullied?
Three. The rest are dead.
Why is it better to date an orphan?
Their parents are never home.
What's funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby in a clown suit.
Suicide gives you security for the future.
Decide the day of suicide and live with full joy till that day, and you can choose to postpone it.
When you tell an orphan, "I did your mom in your home," and they start crying.
Me: You f&*k up.
The class: Oh sh!&
What’s the difference between an Indian and Jewish person?
An Indian person is burnt after death.
Life asked death, "Why do people choose you over me?"
Death replied, "Because you're the beautiful lie, and I'm the painful truth."
Why does Hitler deserve heaven? Because he killed Hitler.