My grandpa died in 9/11. He was a great pilot.
Death Jokes
How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb?
Definitely not 13, because my basement is still dark.
How did Princess Diana die?
Giving the glove box head.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a computer?
I care when my computer crashes.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she got shot. Dumb bitch!
Last week I found out my toaster is waterproof.
If Jeffy goes to an orphanage, he will die. How is he supposed to move?
I ate all of your mommy's orphans.
Did the leaf or the emo fall out of the tree? The leaf won. The rope stopped the emo.
My brother got his legs chopped off, but someone FBI opened my basement door, but it wasn't my brother because he died of starvation in the basement.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To die on the other side.
Why did the cliff feel offended?
Because George jumped OFF. ENDED his life.
(I'm sorry... No, I'm not!)
An orphan walks on a path asking for his mum. Soon he remembers he doesn't have a mum.
(Also, I had sex with ur mum. She was screaming "daddy~")
Iron Man dies.
Why did the skeleton not go to the ball?
He had no-body to go with.
Why didn't the skeleton want to make art anymore?
He didn't have the heart to put into it.
Why are the same Sally jokes told over and over again?
Because how can you tell jokes about someone who's dead?
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
It didn't have the guts to do it.
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and a sack of dead babies?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
No one:
Literally no one:
Abraham Lincoln: *dies*
John Wilkes Booth: *ranks up*
