Death jokes
I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.
He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"
Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"
Go up to an orphan and say: "Yer ma is deed."
What’s the last balloon George Floyd blew up? His heroin balloon.
So my friend died. I was at her casket. I said I'll see you on the other side, so I went to the other side of the casket.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His PC overheated.
One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"
What's worse than 100 dead babies in a skip?
The one that's still alive in the middle trying to eat its way out.
Wanna suck my dick?
No? Well then I'm gonna go hang.
Why don't orphans learn about ancient Egypt? They don't know what mummies are.
Queen Elizabeth died a couple weeks ago. I'm still trying to find the reboot catd.
I wasn't close to my dad when he died.
Which was good. He died during 9/11.
How do you make an emo jump?
A bridge.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To cut through traffic.
End everything and your life, Steven Roca!
Why is death taken so lightly?
Because you can take it so quickly.
My friend died. Me and my other bestie start singing the coffin song. My bestie in the coffin, why are you not sad? Why are you still alive?
I used to have a son, but he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died. For inspiration.
I’ll always remember my father’s last words: “I’m gonna sleep for a little.”
What’s the worst thing to happen to an orphan?
Well, they weren’t always orphans.
Orphan: Help, I'm lost.
Someone: Wears your parents.
Orphan: >:(