Death jokes
"Why didn't the skeleton climb the mountain?"
"It didn't have the guts!"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
How do you make a mime cry?
You kill his family right in front of his stupid face.
You can find perfectly cooked Kobe in a Japanese restaurant, but you can only find burnt Kobe in Calabasas.
My best friend was recently gunned down in a drive-by shooting and died a virgin, but he wasn’t buried one.
About a month ago, I was at my best friend’s funeral and I told him, "Bitches always come and go." He looked at me kinda mad, kinda confused, and said, "That’s my mom, dude."
What's the best thing about a prostitute dying on you during sex?
The second hour is free.
If the US ate chicken, it would die.
An electrician walks into a green house. He sees a red room. He wonders why it's red because Kurt Cobain and his shotgun were sitting there.
What's an emo's favorite type of necklace? The kind that attaches to a ceiling beam.
“Life is going swimmingly,”
“Tell that to Whitney Houston.”
What would you do if you were killed?
What keeps an emo kid from hitting the ground?
The rope.
If George Floyd was in the new Little Mermaid: Under da knee Under da knee Counterfeit 20 Drugs I took plenty Now I can’t breathe
Are you a gravestone?
Because I really wish you were on top of me right now!
The earth was once flat... until they buried your mom.
If just Africa had more mosquito nets, millions of innocent mosquitoes could be saved from a horrible death of AIDS.
"Wubba Lubba Dub Dub" is one way to describe how my inner child acts, but yesterday I killed them. Now I hear "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," I’m drowning in the tub.
Twitter just blew my mind.
I was having a blast until I ended the stream with a bang!
Q: How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
A: You give them a Sandy Hook.