What did Tupac's homies smoke? His ashes.
It would've been too tacky to take a shot in his memory.
Death Jokes
The man who invented Velcro died.
RIP.
"Why didn't the skeleton climb the mountain?"
"It didn't have the guts!"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
Why didn’t the train kill nine families of four?
Because he had no loco-MOTIVE. AHAHAH
About a month ago, I was at my best friend’s funeral and I told him, "Bitches always come and go." He looked at me kinda mad, kinda confused, and said, "That’s my mom, dude."
You can find perfectly cooked Kobe in a Japanese restaurant, but you can only find burnt Kobe in Calabasas.
What's the difference between Derek Boogaard and Kurt Cobain? Nothing, they were both fucked in the brain when they died.
What instrument do skeletons play?
The Trombone!
Why didn't the child go to school?
Because he died of a heroin overdose.
How do you make a mime cry?
You kill his family right in front of his stupid face.
Are you a gravestone?
Because I really wish you were on top of me right now!
What did Kermit the Frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.
I'm a magician. Watch my closing act at the end of the rope.
Q: How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
A: You give them a Sandy Hook.
How did the orphan lose its parents?
Its parents never came back from getting milk.
Person: You can't kill an orphan!
Me: What are they going to do, go tell their parents?
I was in my guitar class and my strings were dead, and then I realized they were more dead than George Bush on November 30, 2018.
I have a saying. Whenever you find a sink, there's probably a dead baby inside it...
Wanna hear a skeleton joke?
Sorry, I don't have the guts to tell it.
