Death jokes

I accidentally said, "Go cry to your mom," to an orphan. 😭

An orphan asked his caretaker where his parents are, and the caretaker said, "A place called home."

Where are your parents? Oh, behind you? Not any more.

A cartoonist was found dead in his home.

The details are SKETCHY! :)

A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree, who hits the ground first? The leaf, because the rope stopped the emo kid.

Why can't ghosts stay happy? Because they are too skeletal.

I will always remember my grandfather's last words before he died: "Is that a real chainsaw?"

What's the difference between a God and my mom?

My mom exists. I mean... she did at one point! Unlike any "Gods."

Why did the orphan cross the road and stop in a lane? To get run over.

A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words.

The man says, “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”

Luca’s Mom and Dad be throwing the kids into the fountain in the city, but they're sea monsters, so if they went to jail for that, they would be on death row anyway. 🤣

So your wife has died, and now she is marginally better in bed than before.

If you really want to get her to wiggle, simply add maggots.

I used to have a son, but he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died. For inspiration.

End everything and your life, Steven Roca!

Mom: “Guess where I’m taking you, son!”

Son: “To the playground?”

Mom: “No, to the morgue.”

I'll unplug your life support for my phone that's about to die.

I will unplug your life support to kill my mum and then give her blood so she can bleed more.

Your Nan is dead.

I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.

He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"

Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"

What did Pavol Demitra think before the Yaroslavl plane hit the ground?

"Oh shit, did I leave the stove on at home?"