Death jokes
Am I considered a cannibal because I told my mom that Grandma's ashes were sugar?
What does an abortion joke and a fetus have in common... The joke never gets old, and neither does the kid.
Her: I love Kobe Bryant!
Me: Helicopter Helicopter
Her:.....
Me: At least you don't say save the trees, cus damn Kobe is good.
How do you know an orphan is lying? When they swear on their mother's life.
What might an aborted child want for Christmas?
..... a home that isn't a bin.
*Coughs roughly* Oh my God, it hurts so much. I can't see. It burns! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! *Weakly*
Why do orphans want to die?
Because they might see their parents in Heaven.
What do you do if you see a nigger shot 50 times? Stop laughing and reload.
What is the worst thing to do at a funeral?
The corpse.
Every woman will die in five seconds.
Mother: Dies.
Sister: Dies.
Girlfriend: Lives.
You: 🤬
I wasn’t close to my dad when he died. It’s a good thing he stepped on a land mine.
One day I was passing a blind man and I gave him a gun and told him it was a blow dryer.
Next day I went for another walk and saw his grave.
I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.
What do Nelson Mandela and Paul Walker have in common?
They both died at 95.
Deku: Hey, Todoroki?
Shoto: Wht?
Deku: I just found out on the news that your dad froze to death. Do you know who did it?
Shoto: :)
A man and a child walk into the woods. The child turns to the man and says, "Mister, can we go home? It's getting late, and I'm scared to walk home."
The man turns to the child and says, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk home alone!"
What do suicidal people and apples have in common?
They both hang from trees.
I would tell a joke about Kobe, but it wouldn’t really land well.
Q: Why is the graveyard so noisy? A: Because all the coffin.
If you don't get it, it means because of people coughing.
Dead.