Death jokes

What might an aborted child want for Christmas?

..... a home that isn't a bin.

What's a suicide bomber's biggest fear?

Dying alone.

This category is messed up.

My Mom died in 9/11, at least she was doing what she loved, flying planes.

What does an abortion joke and a fetus have in common... The joke never gets old, and neither does the kid.

Why do orphans want to die?

Because they might see their parents in Heaven.

*Coughs roughly* Oh my God, it hurts so much. I can't see. It burns! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! *Weakly*

What do you do if you see a nigger shot 50 times? Stop laughing and reload.

What is the worst thing to do at a funeral?

The corpse.

Pass around the roses, their casket full of hoses, crash it, watch it, the water! OH SHIT IT'S GONNA BLOW!

So, me and my friend dressed as dead people for Halloween. The only difference in the costume was that he was actually dead.

I would tell a joke about Kobe, but it wouldn’t really land well.

Am I considered a cannibal because I told my mom that Grandma's ashes were sugar?

Her: I love Kobe Bryant!

Me: Helicopter Helicopter

Her:.....

Me: At least you don't say save the trees, cus damn Kobe is good.

One day I was passing a blind man and I gave him a gun and told him it was a blow dryer.

Next day I went for another walk and saw his grave.

I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.

Every woman will die in five seconds.

Mother: Dies.

Sister: Dies.

Girlfriend: Lives.

You: 🤬

Did you hear about the old Italian chef?? Yeah he pasta away.

Then a man walked comprehending to be him. Everyone knew he was an impasta.

How did Stephen Hawking die?

Somebody threw an EMP at him.

Dead.

Deku: Hey, Todoroki?

Shoto: Wht?

Deku: I just found out on the news that your dad froze to death. Do you know who did it?

Shoto: :)