Death jokes

Technoblade NPC: Gets removed from Minecraft!

Technoblade: Gets removed from real life!

Write a different joke of onions and a dead baby.

Michael Jackson went into an Italian restaurant and died because he choked on 9-year-old meatballs.

Fatty and Skinny sitting in a bed.

Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.

Why should you put an orphanage by a cemetery?

So they can always see their parents.

What happened when the depressed kid went to give it a high five?

It left him hanging.

Why can't orphans have sex?

They don't know who daddy is.

What's black and white, black and white, black and white...?

A dead nun rolling down a hill.

Stephen Hawking died.

What's the difference between my basement and my garage?

One has a pile of babies' bodies; the other has their heads.

Why did the orphan run into the street? To get to the other side of life.

I could never forget my grandfather's last words. "Stop shaking the ladd-"

What was going through the student's heads during a school shooting?

Bullets.

Grandma told me that when she passed away she wants to be a tree, and so she could live forever.

But I'm not gonna lie, it was a nice toasty fire...

How is Stephen Hawking dead?

His Windows shit down.

A mom cow's last words were to the mom cow's son. They were, "You are..." then died. The son thought that he was adopted, but then three years later, the mom cow rose from the dead and said to her son that she was going to say, "You were adorable." Then she died once more. Then two years later, she rose from the dead for the last time to say to her son, "And that's why we adopted you."

Dark humor is like kids with cancer; they never get old.

How do you make a plumber cry?

Kill his whole family.

A man had 10 dead and bloody babies in the middle of his living room. The police suddenly knocked on his door. What is the hardest thing to hide?

- A boner.

So... here's da scoop, alright... *licks KFC off lips* so, I was caught having sex wit three 6 year olds (girls btw, just in case you guys get mad) and da judge told me I was getting da death penalty, you know what I mean?

I had a last resort to save myself though, you feel me? So I told da judge, I said to him, I said: "Yo honah, 6 + 6 + 6 = 18, you smell me?"

Needless to say, I was announced a fre-e-e-e-e-e-e man after dat, you feel me?

But then, the Predator Poachers nigckas just barged into the courtroom and they said: 4 + 4 + 5 = 13!

Alas, I'm writing this joke from jail, and judging by the look my prisonmate Tyrone is giving me, I'll be writing jokes from hell from now on.