Death jokes
What is red, white, and goes round and round?
A baby in a blender.
My grandpa died in 9/11. I was told his last words were "Allahu Akbar."
What did Michael Jackson say?
Nothing, he's dead.
What's the difference between me and an old man? No one pulled my life support.
What's about 12 inches long, has a purple head, and can make women scream all night?
Cot death.
What was going through the student's heads during a school shooting?
Bullets.
How is Stephen Hawking dead?
His Windows shit down.
I could never forget my grandfather's last words. "Stop shaking the ladd-"
Why did the orphan run into the street? To get to the other side of life.
Write a different joke of onions and a dead baby.
Grandma told me that when she passed away she wants to be a tree, and so she could live forever.
But I'm not gonna lie, it was a nice toasty fire...
Where did Joe go after getting lost on the mine field?
Everywhere.
What did one casket say to the other casket?
"Is that you coughin'?"
What’s the difference between Juice WRLD and George Floyd?
Nothing, they both can’t breathe.
Michael Jackson went into an Italian restaurant and died because he choked on 9-year-old meatballs.
What's the difference between my basement and my garage?
One has a pile of babies' bodies; the other has their heads.
Technoblade NPC: Gets removed from Minecraft!
Technoblade: Gets removed from real life!
What happened when the depressed kid went to give it a high five?
It left him hanging.
Why can't orphans have sex?
They don't know who daddy is.
Why should you put an orphanage by a cemetery?
So they can always see their parents.