Death jokes

What is red, white, and goes round and round?

A baby in a blender.

What's about 12 inches long, has a purple head, and can make women scream all night?

Cot death.

What did one casket say to the other casket?

"Is that you coughin'?"

Where did Joe go after getting lost on the mine field?

Everywhere.

Technoblade NPC: Gets removed from Minecraft!

Technoblade: Gets removed from real life!

Michael Jackson went into an Italian restaurant and died because he choked on 9-year-old meatballs.

What happened when the depressed kid went to give it a high five?

It left him hanging.

Why can't orphans have sex?

They don't know who daddy is.

Why should you put an orphanage by a cemetery?

So they can always see their parents.

Stephen Hawking died.

Fatty and Skinny sitting in a bed.

Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.

What's black and white, black and white, black and white...?

A dead nun rolling down a hill.

Why did the orphan run into the street? To get to the other side of life.

I could never forget my grandfather's last words. "Stop shaking the ladd-"

What's the difference between my basement and my garage?

One has a pile of babies' bodies; the other has their heads.

What was going through the student's heads during a school shooting?

Bullets.

I'd tell a Luigi joke, but it would fall flat faster than the line on his victim's heart monitor.

How is Stephen Hawking dead?

His Windows shit down.

Grandma told me that when she passed away she wants to be a tree, and so she could live forever.

But I'm not gonna lie, it was a nice toasty fire...

Write a different joke of onions and a dead baby.