Death jokes

Someone dies.

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red Ferrari?

I don't have the Ferrari.

I was going to kill myself, but in the end, it doesn't even matter.

They all call it self-baptism. I call it failed suicide.

I wonder if any of these people are still alive.

Anyways,

When I arrived at the pearly gates when I died, the guardian asked me how I died. I told him I was just hanging around.

Once I almost died. I'll give it another shot out of the gun to finish my job.

"Hitler wasn't such a bad guy, after all, he did kill Hitler."

If I die, does my depression die with me?

Four kids at my school tried suicide and failed. They are now known as the Suicide Squad.

What were Paul Walker's last words?

I dk probably "WATCH THE FUCKING TREE!"

I once saw a noose joke.

I wanna know how to make one :D

Kobe Bryant ain’t flying that well anymore.

Guys, you shouldn't joke about 9/11.

My great-uncle died that day. Best damn pilot in Iraq.

"Suicide bomber kills 44 people in Pakistan mosque." Damn, that's a crazy K/D. He must be hacking.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knife." "Knife, who?" "How are you still alive? I just stabbed you!"

What happens if you inhale too much nitrous oxide (laughing gas)?

You die of laughter.

So my depressed friend wanted to high-five the tree by the cemetery.

The tree left him hanging though.

Small word of advice: Don't wait till next month or next year to do stuff with the people you love, because they may be gone by then. You don't realize, but every second there is someone who dies, and it just could be your loved one.

They never told us Humpty was an egg. A man died then!

What fell out of the tree first, the apple or the emo?

The apple, the emo was caught by the rope.