Death jokes
I will always remember my uncle's last words, "What's the shovel for?"
Stephen Hawking had a heart attack the year before his death.
They took him to PC World for repairs.
What do you get when you have 10 chicken nuggets and little Jimmy tries to take one?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead little Jimmy.
My dad always wanted one last smoke before his death, so we smoked his ashes.
What's yellow all over and can't swim?
A school bus full of children.
How did Steven Hawking die? His WiFi disconnected.
I'm a fast reader, I can go through 20 stories in a few seconds.
Hey, do you know why America sucks? We have the death penalty.
Cremation: Your last chance for a smoking hot body.
"Where ya going?"
"When I die, hell, but right now, my room."
"Kill yourself."
"Kill me yourself, pussy."
I got a lot running through my head right now. I wish at least one was a 12-gauge round.
If I hung myself from a cliff, would people call me a cliffhanger?
I wanna die.
Why did the chicken want to cross the road? Because he was suicidal and wanted to get hit by a car.
Stephen Hawking died because he did a wheelie and unplugged his charger.
The reason Stephen Hawking died was because his ethernet cable disconnected.
How did Steven Hawking die?
He blew a fuse doing an update.
Why was Timmy the only happy person in his family?
Timmy is dead.
Sally jumped out a plane, she forgot her parachute!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally...
How did she die?
A bomb came down whilst falling through the sky.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
A bomb.