Glock jokes

What do you call an autistic kid with a glock?

Special forces.

Btw, I'm 13.

What do you call an avocado that got shot? Glockamole.

Master has given Dobby a Glock. Dobby is Thug.

"When is the best time to commit suicide?"

Ate a Glock in the morning.

What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Glock 46.

When you're sitting in class and the quiet kid yells, "Lovely day, isn't it?" ... and you see a Glock shape in his pocket.

Oompa Loompa Doobity doo, I got a glock and it’s pointing at you.

What do you get if you cross an avocado and a Glock?

Glockamole.

When you steal the weird pet rock, so he pulls out his pet Glock.

I asked a man if I was the fastest gun in the west. He said my 17 wasn't good enough. After that, a lot of lead went into his head.

When the school shooter is getting roasted because of his Pokemon lunch box, but they don't know that there is a Glock 34 inside.

When the school shooter gives the autistic kid a glock and he shoots himself, thinking it’s a cigarette.

I tell a man, "Get me a Glock 19." He comes back with a glove. I was about to shout at him, but then I saw a pistol in his pocket, so I left and thanked him.

I might slide up to your block with intelligence. I'm a genius with a glock. There's some relevance. Took his chain, took his rocks. Took his sediments. There's no cap inside my speech. No impediments.

Putting numbers on the board, I use my calculator. Put a opp below the floor, he's a denominator. E = mc2, you didn't notice that? Had the shot, but he's too scared. Why didn't he buss it back?

What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? Glock, glock.

I told Hellen Keller it was a hair dryer, little did she know it was a Glock.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a Glock aimed at you.

ble get get get gettttt pull the glock pew pew pew pew pew thats the silencer BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM

I showed my girlfriend my shotgun yesterday. It really blew her away.

Two friends who've been bros for forever see each other in Wal-Mart in the card section. The first guy asks what he got his wife for her birthday. The second guy tells him he got her a Maserati and a card. The first guy tells him he got his wife a card and a dildo for her birthday.

The second guy asks why he got his wife a dildo for her birthday. The first guy says, "If she doesn't like the card I got her, then she can go fuck herself!"

What's the only time you can do almost whatever you want?

When you have a gun in your hand.

You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands. For example, if she's holding a gun, she's probably angry.

Gary Glitter was imprisoned for inappropriate relations with preteens. Not to be outdone, Kelly Clarkson exclaimed, "Hold my Bud Light!" whilst grasping her 1-year-old daughter.