Cut Jokes

Why did the rapper become a barber?

To give everyone FRESH CUTS

How do butts start a conversation?

"Let's cut to the CHASE"

Sat at a busy intersection with a slice of bread waiting for a traffic jam

Cut a hole in the rug so he could see a dirty floor show

He took hay to bed to feed his nightmare

Took a tape measure to bed to see how long he slept

Put his nose out the window so the wind will blow it

Died with his boots on because he didn't want to hurt his toes when he kicked the bucket

Did you hear about the mad who got his whole left side cut off - He's all right now

What is 8 divided by 2? Answer: 3 (you cut 8 in half)

What does an emo kid and pizza have in common......the pizza doesn’t cut itself.

Jesus was being hug up on the cross, and me and all the other people at the bottom of the hill were watching. Jesus cries out ''Peter, peter come to me!'' So I climb up the hill on my hands and knees, and when i reach the top the Romans cut of my arms and chuck me back down the hill. ''Peter, peter come to me!'' cries Jesus once more. I stumble up the hill then the Romans cut my legs of and threw me back down. For the third time Jesus cries ''Peter peter come to me!''. So i wriggle up the hill and I guess the romans pitied me and let me through. ''Look peter, I can see my house from here!''

Did u here about the emo kid who audition for the school play?

He made the cut

How did Steven Hawkings die? He had a power cut x

Why did jesus not win any stanley cups? Because he was cut from the team because he kept being pinned to the boards

MY grandfather said that is was to reliant on technology i called him a hypocrite and cut him of life support.

Whats the difference between a watermelon and an orphan One you cut into 2 with a knife And the water melon you cut into pieces

Guys I guess with all these storms there was a power cut in his house

Hairline got cut by a broken tea cup.

What do 2 emo kids say to each other?

I like ya cut g'* Slaps wrist*