What do you call a swimming terrorist? A bath bomb.
Crime Jokes
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.
Why did the chief go to jail?
Because he beat the eggs and whipped the cream!
We shouldn't joke about major tragedies. My dad died in 9/11, he was Saudi Arabia's best pilot.
What do you call a protest that gets crowded?
Human trafficking.
I don't call it arson. I call it warming up.
What's the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute?
A prostitute can wash its crack and sell it again.
Terrorist: We can go over it, we can’t go under it, let’s go through it.
Hey guys,
I'm starting to think they don't have any candy in this van...
Why do orphans never get 5 stars in GTA 5? Because they are not wanted!
Why can't orphans get five stars in GTA? Because they weren't wanted.
What's the difference between babies and onions?
You don't cry cutting up babies.
If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?
What does the woman say to the cannibal at the fashion show?
"Who are you wearing?"
What did the creep do when the woman said, “Make yourself at home?”
He hid in her attic.
Someone locked me out of my house today... At least the children in my basement aren't my problem anymore.
What's a cannibal's favorite snack?
Men toes! 😂🤣
Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.
His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”
Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”
DARK ALERT********
A girl went to the doctor. The doctor said she had one year to live. She shot the doctor, and the judge gave her 15 years.
DARK ALERT********
I burnt down an orphanage and then showed an orphan the orphanage that I burned down, and he loved it. Not really, though.
