Crime jokes
What’s the difference between a motorcycle and a mutilated body?
I don’t have a motorcycle in my garage.
Why do a pedophile love Halloween?
Free delivery.
My ex died today.
I also lost my job as a butcher.
I went to my local shooting range today but was surprised when I saw on the news that there was a school shooting in my shooting range. I don't know who snitched...
How do you break up blind people in a fight? Scream, "I put my money on the guy with the knife!"
Just wanna repost from my old account
What did the priest say when he walked into an elementary school?
Let us prey.
In History class, the teacher taught a lesson about serial killer Albert Fish. Back in the early 20th century, Fish reportedly kidnapped, ate, and raped over 100 kids. He mainly chose victims who were either retarded or black. Further on the lesson, the teacher explained how in those days, black people were socially not equal with white people, and how people with mental illness were not accepted and treated properly due to a lack of knowledge of mental health.
One of the students raised their hand and said, “You ought to be arrested.” The teacher confusedly asked, “Why?” The student explained, “Because you’re thinking like Albert Fish.”
A man was hitting a woman with his d*ck. Someone ran up to the man and said, "That's domestic violence!" The man replied with, "No, it's not domestic violence, it's dumbass-d*ck violence!"
Why did the Muslim man cross the road? To violently rape an eight-year-old girl, then indoctrinate her with Islamic scripture, and train her as a suicide bomber.
The other day I pushed a Chinese woman off the Golden Gate Bridge. I was Wong on so many levels.
How do pedophiles follow the law?
They drive it slow in the school zone.
Why does a penis taste like octopus 🐙?
Stupid question 😒 🙄 even the catholic church ⛪ 🙏 knows that one.
Alien vs Predator.
Cosby vs E.T.
What do you call it when you get away with masturbating in the shower?
You got off clean.
Did you hear about the four foot tall psychic who escaped prison?
He's a small medium at large.
If you’re gonna have a gangbang, make it extreme!
What’s the difference between prison and concentration camps?
At least you don’t die when you shower.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
'Cause 7 was a 6 offender.
Do you know why I hate pedophiles?
They are fucking immature kids!
I saw a person raping a woman in an alleyway. I decided to help...she doesn't stand a chance between us.