Crime jokes
What does a cannibal ask for when leaving a restaurant?
"Can I have a bodybag?"
Pedophiles don't win races because they like to come in a little behind.
Little girls are like basic math. If they're under 13, you do them in your head.
How do you make it hard for a rapist who is trying to rape you? Rub it.
Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying ten pounds of crack.
What's the difference between drugs and kids?
I don't sell drugs.
Why don’t pedophiles win races?
They like to come in a little behind.
What song did Michael Jackson come up with after his first sleepover with the kid?
"Just Beat It."
Why can't orphans get 5 stars in GTA?
Because they're not wanted.
Did you hear about the Syrian guy that shot a bunch of people? He was Robert Kurd.
What do you call pedophiles on a beach? Pedos in Speedos.
What’s the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
When a person went to a restaurant, they died once they were in. Three people were a suspect. Two were suspected because she served the food. Turns out, it was the food!
Where do rape victims buy their clothes from?
The kids section.
Yesterday I had a party.
I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.
I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!
Why did Arnold throw his clock out of the window?
It reminded him of Richard Clocks, a man convicted for knife raping his wife.
There was a boy named Sammy, and he was deeply in love with a girl named Rayne. But she didn’t notice him or talk to him. But one day, she did, and they end up liking each other and getting married and lived happil- wait no, that’s not right. Sammy snuck in Rayne’s house at night and kidnapped her, locked her in his basement, and turned her into a puppet so she'd be with him forever and ever. The End.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Rape
Rape who?
I go rape you!
Hahaahahahaha Please comment: Bad or good!
I was digging a hole in the garden when I found some gold coins.
I was about to run and tell my wife when I remembered why I was digging a hole in the garden...
What is Jeffrey Dahmer's favorite restaurant?
Five Guys.