Crime jokes
A depressed man was caught on top of the Empire State Building with marijuana. Needless to say, he didn't want to come down.
I like my girls like I like my wine.
12 years old and locked in my basement.
What did the woman do when the armed police officer raped her?
Freeze.
What did the pedophile say to the nutcracker?
"Aren't you a little too young to be doing that?"
What's worse than getting raped in a cemetery? Finding someone else's semen in your mom's corpse.
You heard that Michael Jackson autopsy reports showed he died of food poisoning?
It’s because he ate some 8 year old nuts.
when is rape wrong on so many levels?
inside a lift.
What is a paedophile's favorite thing about Halloween?
Free delivery XD
What's a pedophile's favorite part of Halloween? Free delivery.
A brunette fought and didn't get raped.
A blonde thought and did get raped.
Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to.
Unless you are in prison.
One man walks up to another and says, "Hey, did you hear about the kidnapping at Main Street?" The guy says, "No." The other guy says, "Oh, he woke up."
The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening.
"Sure honey! If you suck my dick!"
So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!"
"Oh yeah, I forgot," says the father. "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."
When is rape normal?
When it's called an unplanned pregnancy.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender.
What do you say to a pedophile at the beach?
Get out of my son!
What do you call a Chinese rapist? Rae ping you.
A priest, a pedophile, and a rapist walk into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink.
Three guys are walking in a bar. A priest, a paedophile, and a rapist. That was just the first guy.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One's plastic and dangerous to play with; the other is to carry groceries.