Crime jokes
Roses are red, I have free candy, get in my van, I have a gun handy.
How many times does 42 go into 9?
Get in the van to find out.
What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy?
"Shhhhhhh, this might hurt a little."
What is harder than steel?
Michael Jackson on a primary school oval. 😂
Mary's mother was a good person. Why did she die?
Because she got stabbed in the heart 60 times by a switchblade.
Memes
Repost from my friends account
What do pedophiles and Sandy Hook have in common?
Shooting up schoolchildren.
What is a paedophile's favorite thing about Halloween?
Free delivery XD
what is the difference between a basement full of dead prostitutes and a bowling ball in the basement?
I don't bowl.
Friend 1: I don't want to jump.
Friend 2: Me neither.
Murderer: If you don't jump, I'll stab you.
Friend 1: *jumps*
Friend 2: *jumps*
Murderer: I didn't mean off the building!
Friend 1: I know that. I just pretended to jump to get rid of that guy.
A brunette fought and didn't get raped.
A blonde thought and did get raped.
When is a rapist safe around children?
When his plans are oven ready.
I lost my dog. I probably shouldn't have named him "rape."
My dad has the heart of a lion, and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
What day is international terrorist day?
September 11th, 2001.
What kind of shoes does a kidnapper wear?
White vans.
What's the difference between a Lambo and 200 children in my basement? One screams; the children don't.
What's a prisoner's favorite game?
Hangman!
What’s the hamburgler’s retarded cousin? Aspergler.
"Why did the band teacher get arrested?"
"For fingering a minor." Ahaha, so funny!
What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a pimple? You never see a pimple come on a little boy’s face.