Crime jokes
Officer, I drop-kicked that child in self-defense!
You gotta believe me!
Why can't orphans play GTA? Because they're not wanted.
How did the burglar get into my house?
Intruder window.
A child is determined to burn his home down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm across the mother and stated, “That’s arson.”
Anyone can do a Michael Jackson impression. All you need is a small boy who can keep a secret.
Memes
Why can’t orphans be criminals?
Because they’re unwanted.🤣😢
Stop hating on pedophiles. At least they're good babysitters.
If you hate pedophiles, grow up.
Why did the orphan kill someone? Because it would make him wanted.
Why did Jeffery Dahmer not eat old people?
He does not like roasted vegetables.
"Lizzie Borden took an axe. And gave her mother forty whacks. When she saw what she had done, She gave her father forty-one."
Why was the Human Torch arrested?
He had firearms.
I was walking down the streets of Manchester when suddenly I saw Penaldo getting arrested! I heard the officer say, “This time I give you warning, there will be no penalty.”
That’s when Penaldo asked, “No penalty?!” and punched the police officer.
Shame on you Penaldo!
What did they find in Jeffery Dahmer's apartment?
Jack in a box.
I was walking down the street and I punched a white guy, then I was arrested for assault. The next day after I got out, I punched a black guy and I was arrested for impersonating a police officer.
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a homeless shelter?
You can shit a load inside of a prostitute, but if you try it in a shelter, you get arrested.
What do you call a terrorist in water?
A bath bomb 😁
What's the toughest stain to wash off a little boy's underpants?
Michael Jackson's lipstick.
What's the difference between a penis and the bible? Nothing, the priest shoved them both down my throat.
They can't say no if they're unconscious.