Crime jokes
Did you hear what happened to Lorainna Bobbit? She was in an accident on the Garden State Parkway. She told the State Police Officer, "That some dick cut her off."
Imagine playing Subway Surfers in real life.
The creator's son tried that!
(My friends said to post this. I accept no responsibility.)
What do you call a nut that screws and then bolts?
An escapee from a mental hospital.
Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?
God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!
Why do they call them a nonce?
Because they go for people who don't have any sense.
POV: Me going to jail after giving the orphan kid a computer without the motherboard.
What do you call a terrorist at a cinema?
A box office bomb.
I looked so deep in the dark web, I started to see Tyrone.
Q: Who is Tracy Latimer's least favorite rapper?
A: Monoxide Child.
I was in Afghanistan and I had been captured by the Taliban. I was going to get the death penalty.
Suddenly a man came out of nowhere and offered to take the penalty. It was my idolo Penaldo. He missed the penalty. Now I will die. Shame on u Penaldo!
How do you make a body disappear?
You use an axe, black plastic bags, a forest, a shovel, and some ice cream because killing someone and chopping them up and digging holes in the ground and putting dirt over them is a lot of hard work!
P.S., I'm joking and don't condone these actions.
When babies kick their mother, it's okay, but when I do it, it's a crime...
Why did Jeffrey get blood on his shoe?
Because this teen just started her period!
How do you kill a sheep?
You lamb shank it!
Not a joke: one of George Floyd's criminal friends shot his grand-niece as they wanted a piece of the 27 million dollars.
I'm so poor that when robbers break into my house,
they bring me things. <_>
Pokemon: What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
What's the difference between a glass of chocolate milk and a toddler?
The thing is, I wasn't arrested for throwing a glass of chocolate milk against the wall.
Bro, please block Kimberly Jones. She keeps trying to scam people.
The pie tasted weird today.
Then I realized that my mother likes cooking pie with human flesh from C town.