Crime jokes
Do you know the murderer, The murderer, the murderer, Do you know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane?
Yes, I know the murderer, The muffin man, the murderer, Yes, I know the murderer, Who lives on Dreary Lane?
What do 9/10 people enjoy?
Gang rape.
Why don’t orphans understand the meaning of a family reunion?
Because they’re not wanted, yet maybe they should rob a 🏦 bank ;)
What does RIP stand for on Maddie's head stone?
Raped in Portugal!
My wife said if I rape her again, she would leave me. Why didn't anyone tell me it was that easy?
Memes
What was the last thing to go through the terrorist's mind? The detonator.
What did the cop say to the muslim breaking the law?
"That's against th-Allah (read like da-law)."
I murdered my friend's brother because he kept saying "HEE HEE" like Michael Jackson when I was trying to have a serious conversation. I just found out he was disabled. That's a THRILLER.
Michael has canceled his upcoming dates. They were Tommy, age 9, and Bobby, 11.
What's the difference between Jeffrey Dahmer and an Emo?
They're both gay and use knives.
A 9-year-old girl lies on a hospital bed struggling to breathe as she waits for the doctor to come.
The doctor finally comes, and the little girl can breathe much easier after he pulls his cock out of her mouth.
Why do eight-year-old girls wear panties with flowers on?
In loving memory of all the faces that were buried in there.
Why do pedos like to lose races? Because they like to cum on a little behind.
A teacher is teaching a class algebra. Timmy, you've worked out it is AK, but what is 59 minus 12? Timmy shakes his head, not knowing. The teacher asks, "How about AK 49 minus 2?" Timmy replies with um... The teacher becomes frustrated and yells, "What comes after AK, Timmy!?" The white kid at the back stands, shouts 47, and pulls the trigger.
I love me a nice tight pussy. That's why I'm in big trouble with RSPCA.
OK, there are at least 3 pedophiles in your neighborhood.
But there are no pedophiles in my neighborhood; there are only three 10-year-old girls with juicy asses.
A man is being sued for raping a deaf girl. The judge, showing his pinky:
"You should be ashamed, man, your conscience is even smaller than that!"
The girl, showing her arm:
"Mhhhmmhmm, mhhmhm!"
Rape victims suck, literally.
Friend: Why did you touch me?
Me: That guy in the corner with no hair, glasses, really nice, white button up shirt, that drives a white van slow by school zones told me to and he would give me hard candy.
What’s harder than steel?
Michael Jackson in a playground.