Crime jokes
What makes piracy and anti-piracy so unique?
One isn't that of a thief, while the other is as serious as fuck.
What do you call an orphan who can't get 5 stars on GTA?
Not wanted.
What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.
Donald Trump didn't build a wall because he likes going to islands to touch little girls.
Why did Jeffrey get blood on his shoe?
Because this teen just started her period!
Roses are red, violets are blue, Old man Jeffrey touches the youth.
What does Jeffrey tell his white teens?
You want to take it orally or through anal? Joke, I'm not asking.
What do you call a party planned by Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
A high school pill party.
What do you get when you cross Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
Predator 2.
Why didn't Donald Trump pick up his phone when Jeffrey Epstein called him?
Because Donald killed Jeffrey Epstein in prison to hide the evidence.
What did Trump say to Epstein? "I like my tea like I like my teens: warm, sweet, and freshly made."
Roses are red, I have a confession:
A man kills best friend after 10hrs anal sex session.
Q: How are Clocks like Pedophiles? A: They both stop at 12.
What's the difference between outlaws and in-laws?
Outlaws are wanted :)
Who comes once a year and makes your kids cry?
Rapey Santa.
The Pope drives around in a glass box, or as I like to call him, a sniper's dream.
Good news, people! Michael Jackson is still alive. They found him hidden away in a goat pen with all the kids!
I'm thinking about telling my daughter there's a ghost in the house. At least then I can wear a bed sheet at night and fuck her without her being suspicious.
The hardest part of picking up a hitch hiker is tying them up.
I wanted to bomb a restaurant, so I went in there with a bomb, but the bomb got diffused and did not work.
I asked a person standing nearby. I said, "Hey, do you know how to fix this bomb so I can blow up this place?"
He gave me a book.
It was the Quran.
I said, "What the hell is that?"
He said, "This is the official manual for bomb making."