Crime jokes
How do you make a body disappear?
You use an axe, black plastic bags, a forest, a shovel, and some ice cream because killing someone and chopping them up and digging holes in the ground and putting dirt over them is a lot of hard work!
P.S., I'm joking and don't condone these actions.
How do you kill a sheep?
You lamb shank it!
I was making fun of an orphan, then I realized he tracked me down. I made a bad decision. He was Batman!
What touches kids and is made out of plastic?
Michael Jackson, hee hee!
Why didn't R. Kelly go to Germany to fuck teens? The legal age there is 14...Like bro hop on a plane and fuck a 14 year old hooker!
I had sex with twins. Well, I think it was twins. All my rage victims look alike.
How do you make rape funny? Tickle her while you do it.
What makes piracy and anti-piracy so unique?
One isn't that of a thief, while the other is as serious as fuck.
What do you call an orphan who can't get 5 stars on GTA?
Not wanted.
What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.
Donald Trump didn't build a wall because he likes going to islands to touch little girls.
Why did Jeffrey get blood on his shoe?
Because this teen just started her period!
Roses are red, violets are blue, Old man Jeffrey touches the youth.
What does Jeffrey tell his white teens?
You want to take it orally or through anal? Joke, I'm not asking.
What do you call a party planned by Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
A high school pill party.
What do you get when you cross Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
Predator 2.
Why didn't Donald Trump pick up his phone when Jeffrey Epstein called him?
Because Donald killed Jeffrey Epstein in prison to hide the evidence.
What did Trump say to Epstein? "I like my tea like I like my teens: warm, sweet, and freshly made."
Roses are red, I have a confession:
A man kills best friend after 10hrs anal sex session.
Q: How are Clocks like Pedophiles? A: They both stop at 12.