Construction jokes
I remember my grandfather's last words:
"Are you holding the ladder?"
Why did the first fence hate the other fence?
The second fence used some of-fensive language.
Hey, wanna hear a construction joke?
- Sure.
Oh sorry, I'm still working on it :-]
What did one wall say to the other wall?
Meet you at the corner!
Confusion life question!!!
* Can you cry underwater? * Do fishes ever get thirsty? * Why don't birds fall out the tree when they sleep? * Why is a building called that when it's already built? * When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?
Memes
Bang-Bang
What did the other traffic cone say to the other?
"Look away, I'm changing!"
What do renovators and lesbians have in common?
They're both not interested in exposed wood, apparently.
What do you call a dwarf that fell into a cement mixer?
A wee hard man.
What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a nail?
Answer: You can unscrew the nail.
What does a skeleton tile his roof with?
Shin-gles!
What did the fish say when he got to the dam?
"Dam water."
"Dam!"
What is the difference between a human and a magic car 🚗?
A magic car can fly, and a house 🏡 cannot fly.
What will Donald Trump build in our devices?
A firewall.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how big they are and how hard you throw them.
Why does Trump build a wall?
There’s such a thing as a ladder.
What's red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.
I would like to make a Minecraft joke...
It would be too plain.
What the hell dam, hell dam?
Dam, sometimes when I look at my friend's head, I say, "Dam, that's a dam big head, Nick." Then he is like, "Dude, that's a literal dam."