Construction jokes
Why is a brick always hard? Because he seen the brick that was getting laid right next to him.
What did the beaver say to his son?
Dam, son.
The shovel is a ground breaking invention.
*Slaps and laughs*
What did the screw say to the screw? We sure screwed things up!
How many screws does it take to construct a lesbian's bed?
None, it's all tongue and groove...
What do you call an orphan at a construction site?
Child labor.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how many you throw.
I need more webs and I need more supplies for more webs, how do I make them? With spiders!
What's harder than steel? Joe Biden at a playground.
What do you call a bad piece of wood? Knotty.
I don’t like stairs. They are always up to something.
How many babies does it take to paint a barn red? Well, it depends on how hard you throw them.
When is a door not a door?
When it’s ajar!
Americans prefer houses with basements. In fact, they're best cellars!
A father and three sons are renovating a house when a wall of that house collapses and breaks the father's back. Keeping calm, he tells the sons, "Well, I guess this is what you would call back-breaking labor." He chuckled, then passed out from pain.
Did you know that the shovel was a groundbreaking invention?
What did Shrek say to the princess? “I love walls!”
Why should you be wary of stairs? -- Because they are always up to something.
Q: How many children does it take to shingle a roof?
A: Depends on how thinly you slice them.
Disabled people can help the world to get a printed copy of "Leaning Tower of Pisa," exactly leaned at an angle.