Conflict jokes
What did the soldier say when he saw a terrorist in a wheelchair?
"An RC-XD!"
Ukraine be like dead children...
RUSSIA BE LIKE DEAD GENERALS!
A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"
What do you call a food fight that's been going on for years?
A war of nutrition.
What do you call two guys fighting over a slut?
Tug of whore.
A man wakes up and asks his wife, “Are you okay? You were cursing me all night in your sleep.” The wife replies, “Who says I was sleeping?”
Palestinians leave without saying goodbye.
Israel says goodbye when the Americans say so.
*America shoots down balloon*
China: "You killed an innocent man!!"
USA: "What?!"
China: "Yes, he was a famous sumo wrestler."
What do children with cancer and Russian soldiers have in common? Their life doesn't last long.
*World War 2 going on and then stops.*
Me: "I guess you would say it was a gory-ious battle."
Why did the terrorist not go undercover?
Because he blew it!
If a vegan and a vegan have a fight, is it still considered beef?
Why can't weapons play baseball?
Because they need to get to home base.
Russia: "Silence."
Ukraine: Help...
What sounds did the Ukraine people make in basketball? Ka-boom!
Anne Frank is still the Nazi hide-and-go-seek champion.
Mrs. Kadie, I just heard about a FGTEEV video about vegan nuggets.
Duddy: Sup FGTEEVERS, me and James Marsden just got some Chick-fil-A.
Viewers: Got ya again Mrs. Kadie.
Mrs. Kadie: Vincent and James, I am going to push you off your roof.
Duddy and James: AHHHHHHH!
Violence isn't the answer. It's the question, and the answer is yes.
I've spent most of my life avoiding conflict. That's why I'm never intending to visit Syria.
How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?
QUEUE THE MUSIC
BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT