Lard

Lard Jokes

Yo mama

Yo mama was so fat that when she stepped on the scale, the scale said: "OOOWWWWW!!!! Get off me, you overweight bucket of lard."

Mum

What's full of lard and is reserved as Putin's cannon fodder?

Your mum!!!

Difference

What's the difference between a square peg in a round hole and a kilo of lard?

One's a good lot of fat; the other's a fat lot of good.