Conflict jokes
So, I am an emo dude, so I sit in the back of the class, and I talk to no one.
But one day this dude came up to me and tried to talk to me, so I just ignored him. Then he got really pissed off and said, "I'm gonna kill you." I was like, "You're gonna kill me just because I ignored you? Is your ego that big, wow?" He left. Then the next day he brought his goons with him and said, "Now you're dead." I ignored him again, and he said, "You will pay for this."
So the following day after school I was walking down the street back to my house. Then he and his goons tried to attack me, but then they died, so I kept on walking. I had some rope traps set.
This was the best day of my life.
This is why you never mess with emos. We have ropes everywhere.
Science flew us to the moon.
Religion flew us into two skyscrapers.
On Paxomedy channel, I made a video of a Rooster and a dog fighting.
I needed to know why they were fighting. Once I dug down into the issue, it turned out that the Dog called the Rooster a Cock, and the Rooster laughed and called the Dog a useless Bitch, and that was the beginning of their fight, and weird enough, the Cock won!
I went to congratulate the winner, but he thought he was insulting me by calling me Zinjathropus, but I said that was a compliment because Zinja was an old skeleton found in Africa, and I am African. I said to the Rooster he shouldn't have fought with the dog just because he called him a Cock. He said that being called a Cock is a compliment, and the fighting was his exercise to toughen up for serious fights with Dogs!
Nobody:
The Vietcong when America lands on their beaches:
tReE pOwErS aCtIvAtE!
What do you call a cemetery of dead Arabs? A mine field.
Family feud after finding out about Alabama.
"Pootin is a pussy won't even fight in the war that he started!"
"Pootin is a pussy and Ukraine is beating Russia's ass!"
Iran: We can beat the USA.
Japan: You do realize we beat him in Battleship, and he dropped the sun on us.
Iran: So?
Japan: Twice!
How [does] a disabled kid face [the] Jalalas?
He can't run, just hug the bomb.
Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"
What war game can the French win? None, they are always losing.
Why did the Carthaginian say Rome lost the war?
Because they were just roman around.
Gay people would suck at war.
When someone asks you for a beef (fight), just say you're a vegetarian.
Why was the Roman soldier kicked out of the army? Because he was "Romin" around during war.
Iran? More like tin can, cause we’re going to kick their teeth in, am I right?
A man wakes up and asks his wife, “Are you okay? You were cursing me all night in your sleep.” The wife replies, “Who says I was sleeping?”
What do you call two guys fighting over a slut?
Tug of whore.
Palestinians leave without saying goodbye.
Israel says goodbye when the Americans say so.
What do children with cancer and Russian soldiers have in common? Their life doesn't last long.