Mine Jokes

Sister

Jesse

A girl noticed hair growing between her legs and asked her mom about it. Her mom said it was her monkey and it grows hair.so she told her sister and her sister said that aint nothing mines already eating bananas

Bot

im a robottttttt bot

im a bot so coollllll"

Doctor

Yggdrasil Crimson

I asked the doctor doing my prostate exam where i should put my pants. "next to mine" was not the answer i was expecting

7

Marriage

Anonymous

Two men were talking about their wives

The first man says "My wife is an angel." The second man says "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

Woman

Anonymous

I was watching my daughter play at the park, a woman came up to me and asked which one was mine, I said I was still choosing.

Depression

Anonymous

people talking me asking whats the worst day in the year for them. Person 1: The first day of school cause i don't like going to school

Person 2: Valentines day cause its to lovey

Me: oh nice mines my birthday cause its when i was born

4

Mineral

Anonymous

What state do miners hate? Ore Gon

Orphan

Random Person

On Xbox live an orphan can say they f ed your mom so you can say at least mine didnt die from it.

0

Suck

john doe

SHAENAYA WANTS TO SUCK EVERYBOYS DICK BESIDES MINE CAUSE SHE A THIRSTY HOE

Jesus

"Jesus can turn water into wine,but I can turn your mother into mine " -Sun Tzu the art of creating war

Kid

Anonymous

I was sitting at a bench at the park and saw a lady she asked which kid is mine and I responded I haven't decided yet

Son

Hey what’s your favorite type of tomato? Mine is Sundyed tomato

Get it sundyed like son died

Michael Jackson

Victor Greywolf

What was one phrase Michael Jackson said to a boy in his bed? Baby be mine.

Ear

What Would Jesus Do

So Fred accidentally cut off John's ear with his spade. John and Fred were digging a ditch when Fred made a careless swipe with his spade and cut off John's ear.

"Help me find it in all this mud," said John. "If we find it they can sew it back on."

After a couple of minutes, Fred triumphantly shouted, "Here it is", handing the ear to John.

"That's not it," said John, throwing the ear back into the muddy ditch. "Mine had a pencil behind it."

Ride

jackets off rn

i was riding my bike when i saw a mans head in the wheel. it was mine.

Wife

I was horrified when my wife told me that my six-year-old son wasn't actually mine. Apparently I need to pay more attention during school pick-up.