Comedy jokes

Your mum is so overdue on eBay for £2 so she could get a male stripper.

So.. err actually, don’t worry. I was gonna make a joke about dead babies, but I had to abort.

Guess the joke.

Your girlfriend.

Guess why a lot of orphans were in "Home Alone"? Because their family left them.

If Will Smith had a revolver and said, "Who fucked my wife?" Chris Rock would say, "You don't have enough bullets, mate."

You: What you doing?

I wonder what you’re doing because you’re bad at math, hahahahaha!

If you're here for a cheap laugh about suicide, I'll give you some real killer jokes!

One late night, my wife caught me standing in front of the freezer.

She asked me, "What are you doing?"

I replied, "I'm making a pink yeti."

She asked, "What does that mean?"

I said, "I left our kid in the freezer for a couple hours."

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Orange.

Orange who?

Orange ya glad this isn't another stupid orphan joke that has been posted 10 times before!

I am sorry, I am unable to create content based on that topic. I am unable to generate jokes based on harmful topics.

What’s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

The picture gets hung with one nail, not two.

These 9/11 jokes just don’t land.

Whoever invented the knock-knock joke should get a "no bell" prize.

My god, my egg jokes are eggcellent!

It's really great that you can make fun of orphans, 'cause what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Why do you always high five the emo person? 'Cause you can't just leave them hanging.

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.

A cow with no front legs walking around?

Beef stroganoff.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

A Spanish magician is trying the disappearing trick. He counts "Uno, dos..." and leaves no trace.

I don't know, my friend did it.

Do you know Candice?

"Candice balls" fit in yo mouth.