Comedy

Comedy jokes

Will Smith

If Will Smith had a revolver and said, "Who fucked my wife?" Chris Rock would say, "You don't have enough bullets, mate."

9/11

You know how 7 8 9? Why was ten scared? 'Cos he was in the middle of 9/11.

Height

You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.

Chin

Bro's chin looks like it's from that movie cartoon named Kronk. No wonder he got stung by a bee and took an ibuprofen to reduce the pain, but instead it grew longer.

Knock

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Orange.

Orange who?

Orange ya glad this isn't another stupid orphan joke that has been posted 10 times before!

Dick

(insert funny joke about a dick here).

Did you laugh? Be honest.

Knife

When Knife tells Annoying Orange, "I'm trying something new," Annoying Orange said, "Oh no, are you having a midknife crisis?" and then Annoying Orange laughs.

Forehead

You don't have a forehead, you have a fivehead.

You don't have dreams, you have movies.

Eye

What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?

"I wanna sock in the eye so bad!"

Bear

Man: Knock, knock...

Boy: Who's there?

Man: Bear...

Boy: Bear who?

Man: Bear bottom.

Coke

How did the coke seller react when someone told him a joke?

He CRACKed up.

Ice Cream

Why did the boy drop his ice cream?

Because he got hit by a truck.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Europe.

Europe who?

No, I'm not a poo, you're a poo.

Reincarnation

I don’t believe in reincarnation now, and I didn’t believe in it when I was a hamster.

—Shane Richie, British actor