Comedy

Comedy Jokes

Orphan

There are a lot of upsides to being an orphan.

For one, you never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.

Redhead

How do you tell whether you’ve satisfied a redhead?

She unlocks the handcuffs.

Mickey Mouse

Mickey Mouse is speaking with a divorce attorney...

...and the attorney says, "I'm sorry Mickey, I've gone over all of Minnie's medical history and I find no evidence of mental illness."

To which Mickey replies, "I didn't say she's crazy! I said she's fucking Goofy!"

Tire

What does an Asian say when his car tires burst on the highway?

"Some Ting Wheely Wong!"

Character

Your race's favorite Star Wars Characters:

Arab...Admiral Ackbar (Allahu Akbar)

East Asian...Qui-Gon Jinn (Ching-Chong-Wing-Wong)

Jew...Rey (Ray)

Black...BB-8 (BBC)

Italian...Jabba the Hutt (Pizza Hut)

German...Admiral Piett (Hitler)

Cop

My jokes are so dark that I am surprised that the cops didn't shoot them yet.

Way

The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them:

"Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"