Comedy jokes

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Uriah. Uriah who? Keep Uriah on the ball, Laquon Treadwell!

Do you wanna hear a joke about vegetables? Never mind, it's too corny.

I have an account at the website Memedroid.

My name is J0K35FromWJE.

Feel free to follow me, and I WILL upload to Memedroid (I might not upload daily).

I will still make jokes here jlyk (just letting you know).

Ok here's your joke now...

What did one pizza say to the other when they were in bed?

"Can I have a pizza that ass?"

Here's a joke: Your life.

Why did the Polish Roman Catholic priest remove zippers from the pants of gay men in the LGBT community?

Because he lost his key to his house and he was desperate to get back inside of his house and he thought that one of keys to their zippers would be able to unlock the door of his house.

Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).

1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.

3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.

4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.

5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!

6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."

7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.

8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.

Note to all.

My name is Lariah. Lariah Carla Brown, 14 years old and I am 1 of triplets. I don't understand how rape jokes are funny, and I just want to make that statement clear. I also hate orphan jokes because I WAS one. Notice when I put WAS! I also see jokes about cancer, now I know you can't be kidding. You know that cancer is a disease that many people get and could die from, so you are just wrong about that!

The person who is reading this.

I am an Indian joke.

Why couldn't Sally get back up? Because she has no friends.

If someone told me to bring up 9/11, they were trying to make a funny joke, but it didn't work.

That one really *crashed and burned*.

I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I’ve ever seen!

Me: I want to be a stand-up comedian.

Friend: You have to be able to stand up.

Why do people laugh at mountains?

Because they're HILLarious!

I have a really good joke.

Do you want to hear it?

Oh wait, this is a bad joke website.

I was about to make a baby joke but then decided to abort.

When other people tell a joke, 3/3 people laugh.

When I tell a joke, 1/3 people laugh, but 2/3 people stare into my soul.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Interrupting cow.

Interrupting cow wh---

MOOOO!

Knock, knock? Who's there? French. French who? French fries!

What is cats and dogs' favorite story and movie?

"Romeow and Drooliet!"