Child jokes

What is more time-consuming than children?

Waiting for your wife to go into labor!

Stranger: Do you want a lollipop?

Kid: No, I hate lollipops, so yeah, and you are not my daddy.

I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.

What’s the difference between an orphan and a donut?

People want donuts.

What’s long, yellow, and doesn’t float?

A school bus filled with children.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall?

I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

Why couldn't the orphan use the swing? Because they had no arms.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they will never get home.

Q: What's yellow and can't swim?

A: A school bus full of children.

When your wife gets pregnant and you don't want a kid, just come on down to Momma Mia's Pizzeria and abortion clinic!

Little Johnny died.

Why can’t orphans have sex? Because they have no one to call "daddy."

I molested a child today, and it felt quite lovely on my penis! 👍

My blind son got hit by a car when he was riding his new bike. He should have been paying attention.

A child's parents once lived in Chicago.

I wonder why he's in an orphanage now.

A child with cancer says, "Mother, what will I be when I grow up?"

Then the mother says, "Shut up, dick, you have cancer!" Hehehe.

What did an orphan say to its father?

Nothing.

Why can't orphans play golf?

Because they can't find home.

Jorden Calerendiá.

I bet you are a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, by the way your roasts are not fucking funny they are bullshit like your face and your hairline.

Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because there is no home plate.