Child jokes
What is more time-consuming than children?
Waiting for your wife to go into labor!
Q: What's yellow and can't swim?
A: A school bus full of children.
Little Johnny died.
My blind son got hit by a car when he was riding his new bike. He should have been paying attention.
I molested a child today, and it felt quite lovely on my penis! π
Memes
Why canβt orphans have sex? Because they have no one to call "daddy."
What did an orphan say to its father?
Nothing.
Why can orphans not play baseball? They can't hit a home run.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apples get picked.
Why does Little Johnny hate hot dogs?
It reminds him of last night.
How is sports like regular life for orphans?
They don't get picked for either.
When the card declines on child insurance.
Can an orphan child be arrested for vandalism, or will the officers ask for their parents to talk to?
Who is the first person an orphan sees? The doctor.
Why can't orphans play golf?
Because they can't find home.
Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
They never reached home.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home base.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
What's an orphan's favorite sport?
Baseball, because that's the only time they can run home.