Child jokes
I saw an orphan in the grocery store and asked him, "Where's your mom?" and he cried. Why?
I was walking till I saw a kid sitting on the street. I walked over there and said, "Where are your parents?" He cried even more.
Oh, I just love talking to orphans.
How many kids does it take to change a light bulb? Well, it's not 53, 'cause my basement's still dark.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
He doesn't know where home is.
Why do orphans rob banks?
Because they wanna feel wanted.
What's an orphan's favorite sport?
Baseball, because that's the only time they can run home.
A priest says to me, "Come up, my child." Then I said, "Do I know you? Because you're not my father."
Can an orphan child be arrested for vandalism, or will the officers ask for their parents to talk to?
Why was Six afraid of Seven?
Because 7 was accused of the murder of 26 children.
What's brown and sticky?
An orphan.
What is the difference between an orphan and Pikachu? Pikachu, I choose you!
Why are orphans so good at tennis?
They never get love.
What’s the difference between Jeffrey Dahmer and a priest?
They both like lil' boys.
Why do orphans play baseball because they try to find home?
What's yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of children.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
Neither can see their parents.
A plane is going to crash. There are four passengers and only three parachutes. All the staff are safe and are gone, leaving the passengers. Ryan Reynolds is the first. He says, "My fans need me," and jumps. Donald Trump takes another and says, "I am the smartest president," and jumps, leaving one. There is a pope and a boy left. The pope says, "Child, my life is over and yours has just begun, take the last parachute." The boy replies, "Don't worry - Donald took my backpack."
What's the difference between a white kid and a computer?
The child has no trouble shooting.
What story does an orphan always get kicked out of? Home Depot.
Kid: "Hey dad, what's dark humor?"
Dad: "Go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him."
Kid: "But dad, I don't have any legs or arms."
Dad: "Exactly, son."