Three dead bodies are delivered to the mortuary one day. Each of them has a great big smile on their face.
The coroner examines the bodies and then calls the police to tell them what has happened.
"First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure while making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector", says the coroner.
"Second body: Scotsman, 25, won a thousand pounds on the lottery, spent it all on whisky. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile."
The inspector then asks, "What about the third body?"
"Ah," says the coroner, "This is the most unusual one. Billy-Bob the redneck from Oklahoma, 30, struck by lightning."
"Why is he smiling then?" asks the inspector.
"He thought he was having his picture taken."
A blondie and a redneck jumped off a building which one will land first?
The redneck because the blonde will ask for directions
A guy was on trial for murder and if convicted, would get the electric chair. His brother found out that a redneck was on the jury and figured he would be the one to bribe. He told the redneck that he would be paid $10,000 if he could convince the rest of the jury to reduce the charge to manslaughter.
The jury was out an entire week and returned with a verdict of manslaughter.
After the trial, the brother went to the redneck's house, told him what a great job he had done and paid him the $10,000.
The red neck replied that it wasn't easy to convince the rest of the jury to change the charge to manslaughter. They all thought he was not guilty and, wanted to let him go.
What do you call a group of Alabama superheroes? The incredibles
People think Kelly Clarkson shops at Wal-Mart because she's a sloppy redneck. No, it's because toddlers' pants are 75% off everyday!
3 rednecks Billy,Joe and John talk about they hobbies, they agree shooting. John says i like shooting animals. Joe says I like shooting birds. Billy says I like shooting cans. Joe and John ask "what kind of can like bear cans, pepsi cans or cola cans". Billy respond Africans, Mexicans, Jamaicans and Asian Americans.
Why does Mexico not have a Olympic team?
Because all of them that can jump,swim,and run are already here.
Gays are always welcome on my Redneck Party Bus. NOT!
Whaddaya got when ya got yourself a deer with no eyes?
Ya got no-eye-dear.
If you take your dog for a walk and you BOTH use the fire hydrant down at the corner...you might be a Redneck!
Magician..." I am the greatest magician in the whole world... look now you see the rabbit in the hat and now it is gone!...Redneck girl..."That`s nothing my dad is the greatest magician! He disappears for a whole year and reappears at Christmas for a couple hours!"...
what is a rednecks favorite sock
redsock