What is the difference between the Twin Towers and Elton John?
Elton John is still standing.
Celebrity Jokes
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
What did Chris Brown say the first time he saw Rihanna?
I’d hit that.
You're so cool that celebrities take pictures of you.
What's the difference between a rubber and Michael Jackson? Nothing, kids touch them both.
What does Michael Jackson and Chef from South Park have in common?
They both say "Hello children!"
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
What is fully grown but can fit through small objects? Michael Jackson.
What is worse than ants in your pants? Michael Jackson.
Why is Stephen Hawking a bad influence on children?
Because he only looks one way when crossing the road.
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? Both of their greatest hits are "the wall."
Why are people surprised by Johnny Depp having $30,000 wine bills, domestic violence accusations, rampant substance abuse, poor hygiene, and the looks of a predator?
He grew up a Florida Man, after all.
What did Nicki Minaj say when she sat next to a bomb?
"Bang bang right through the roof. Bang bang all over you."
da baby
What do world hunger and a Mercedes have in common?
Princess Diana couldn't stop both of them.
Where did Michael Jackson go to college?
Bring 'em young.
I respect anyone who devotes their life to charity work.
But I think Paul Walker went a step too far.
What did the lady say to Michael Jackson on the beach?
"Excuse me sir, but you're in my sun."
Why do kids like Michael Jackson so much?
Because he's made out of plastic, and that's what toys are made out of! 😂
A plane is going to crash. There are four passengers and only three parachutes. All the staff are safe and are gone, leaving the passengers. Ryan Reynolds is the first. He says, "My fans need me," and jumps. Donald Trump takes another and says, "I am the smartest president," and jumps, leaving one. There is a pope and a boy left. The pope says, "Child, my life is over and yours has just begun, take the last parachute." The boy replies, "Don't worry - Donald took my backpack."
