What did Nicki Minaj say when she sat next to a bomb?
"Bang bang right through the roof. Bang bang all over you."
Why does Michael Jackson like Chef Boyardee? He likes the little balls.
Why are people surprised by Johnny Depp having $30,000 wine bills, domestic violence accusations, rampant substance abuse, poor hygiene, and the looks of a predator?
He grew up a Florida Man, after all.
da baby
What do world hunger and a Mercedes have in common?
Princess Diana couldn't stop both of them.
You heard that Michael Jackson autopsy reports showed he died of food poisoning?
It’s because he ate some 8 year old nuts.
I respect anyone who devotes their life to charity work.
But I think Paul Walker went a step too far.
Why was Michael Jackson at Kmart?
He heard they had little boys' pants 1/2 off.
What's white and comes in little cans?
Michael Jackson.
A plane is going to crash. There are four passengers and only three parachutes. All the staff are safe and are gone, leaving the passengers. Ryan Reynolds is the first. He says, "My fans need me," and jumps. Donald Trump takes another and says, "I am the smartest president," and jumps, leaving one. There is a pope and a boy left. The pope says, "Child, my life is over and yours has just begun, take the last parachute." The boy replies, "Don't worry - Donald took my backpack."
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
Why is Stephen Hawking a bad influence on children?
Because he only looks one way when crossing the road.
Why did Michael Jackson decide to sell the ranch?
Because it was over 10 years old.
Why can't orphans celebrate Christmas?
Father Christmas left them.
At the age of 100, you get a letter from the Queen. At 12, you get a DM from Prince Charles.
What's green and sings?
Elvis Parsley!
Why did Michael Jackson love melted chocolate? Because he could pour it on his cock, then get a prepubescent boy to suck it off.
Did you hear they think Michael Jackson died from food poisoning? He ate 12-year-old nuts and a 13-year-old wiener.
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite pasta?
Spaghett-hehe.
The time when Michael Jackson came in his pajamas during the trial. Whether or not it was because he saw a 7-year-old boy has yet to be determined.
