Can jokes

Your mama is so stupid she stayed up all night so she can get some sleep.

Why do cannibals love sex? They can make their own food.

People go to places to see Harry Potter live, but you can just go to the abortion place and see something disappear.

I'm bored so can y'all ask me some questions and I have to answer them?

Period: Guess who’s back... back again...

Me: Ugh, can we not do this today?

Period: I can come back in 9 months?

Me: Keep fucking singing.

A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."

When the guy came in with a gun to rob the store, I said: "Hey, can I borrow that?"

He says "yes." Me, over here, walking to the cashier and saying: "Goodbye!" He screams: "Have mercy!"

I say: "No, not to you, to me. Say goodbye." He says: "No, don't shoot yourself!" It was too late.

Once in 4th grade, right now, I told a random tree, "Hey, my day is bad right now, can we hang later?"

The tree said: "Yeah, we are going to be hanging every day :) !!! If you can last :)"

"Can I throw you away? You look like my trash can. Oh, wait, you *are* my trash can."

My pits are hairy, but my I can carry.

Your mom is so fat nobody can compare her to anything.

Why do orphans never use other people's Wi-Fi?

So they can be connected.

What do you call a disabled person that can walk?

Enabled.

Why do I love a block? Because I can fall off the stairs.

So, three guys are walking carefully into a bar.

The bartender said, "What can I get you, gentlemen?"

What can you build with people? A boat!

What do you get when skeletons are dancing in a tin can?

Noise!

If anyone can see Alya KUHL please tell me! I love and miss her...

What kind of nuts come in cans?

Creamed a-corn.

What can you do if you have a rotten piece of candy?