Call jokes
What do you call a Chinese baby?
Sum Ting Wong.
What are intelligent people in the US called?
"Tourist."
The inventor of the umbrella was just going to call it "brella," but he hesitated.
What do you call Hiroshima and Nagasaki?
The world's first microwaves.
Why am I banned from my Catholic orphanage?
Because the children kept calling me "daddy."
My doctor called me a "psychopath." How dare he?!? He'll pay for this!
What do you call a wild cow in a shop with old things?
A bull in a china shop.
Me: What do you call 4 depressed kids?
My friend: What?
Me: The Suicide Squad.
Men should pay for the first date, that’s why it’s called a (men)u.
Then women should do the dishes, that’s why they call it a dish wash(her).
What do you call a retarded fruit?
Mentally in-pear-ed.
If sex with three people is called a threesome and sex with four people is called a foursome, I guess now it's clear why everyone calls me handsome.
What do you call a bunch of Muslims in a bath?
A bath bomb.
What do you call a dwarf with borderline autism? Jimothy.
What is a gathering of octopuses called?
Octoposse.
What do they call me when I jack off?
Pulled pork.
I call my dad a motherfucker because he fucked his mom.
I got a call from NASA. They’ve reached your hairline.
What do you call a Mexican Transformer? Optimus Juan!
What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed?
High steaks gambling.
A hand of Pepsi murdered a Coca Cola. An innocent Sprite yelled, "Quick! Call Dr. Pepper!"
Eventually, a 7-Up called Dr. Pepper. The Coca Cola was fine.