Why did the crumb cake isolate himself? He had a crumbling social life.
How is baseball like cake?
They both need batters.
What did Hitler get for his birthday?
A G.I. Jew and an Easy Bake Oven.
Do you wanna know how I recently seduced an obese woman? Actually, it was a piece of cake.
What did the blind kid get for his birthday?
I don't know, he still didn't look.
Every time someone calls me fat, I get so depressed I cut myself... a piece of cake.
Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher said it would be a piece of cake! 🎂😂
What is the best part about eating cake? Your mom.
Why do orphans have gross cakes?
Because their dad didn't come home with the milk.
What do you call a gay man with a thicc ass?
Fruit cake.
haha why couldn't the bike stand up because it was too tired.
Fake emo: when I’m sad, I cut myself.
Real emo: same.
Fake emo: another piece of cake.
Why did the cake say to the scammer? "I'll scam you up!"
You also have to learn to say no. For example: "Would you like a piece of cake?" "No, I'd like two."
1. If being ugly was a crime, you would have a life sentence.
2. My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships.
3. There is a tree out there giving you oxygen, and you owe that tree an apology.
4. I don’t hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone.
5. When I saw your dad on the sidewalk, I didn’t laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
6. If I had powers, I would make you the dumbest person alive, but it seems life already beat me to the punch.
7. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it.
8. If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I’d be broke.
9. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting.
10. Were you born on a highway, 'cause that’s where most accidents happen?
11. Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya.
12. You're the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented.
What flour do orphans use whilst making cakes- self-raising (rising)
Hi 👋
I-I-I-I-I-I keep on hopin' we'll eat cake by the ocean, uh!
I hate my birthday. For my first birthday my mom gave me my life. I liked it when it was new and fun. Now it's broken and sad and I wanna take it back.
For my birthday on September 11th this year, I just want a plane, but delicious, chocolate cake.
