Broken jokes

Me: Dad, my phone is broken.

Dad: How?

Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.

Dad: Stupid.

I wanna tell you guys a joke about a broken pencil...

But it’s quite pointless.

*The doctor asking why I've broken 19 bones in the past week*

*My abusive mum- Go on, tell him!*

Well what am I gonna do now...

How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.

I went to the doctor's yesterday. I said, "When I touch my back, it hurts. When I touch my knee, it hurts. When I touch anything, it hurts!" 😣 What’s wrong with me?

Doctor: You’ve broken your finger.

Roses are red, Obama is well spoken, I'm sorry sir, but the ice cream machine is broken.

I awoke after being raped and was shocked to find my fingers were broken. It was hard to grasp.

A skeleton walks into the hospital and said: "Doctor, Doctor, I broke my leg!" The doctor said: "I see..."

What did one snow ❄️ man say to itself? My arm is broken.

What kind of ankle are you? A broken ankle.

I hate my birthday. For my first birthday my mom gave me my life. I liked it when it was new and fun. Now it's broken and sad and I wanna take it back.

I feel like the Twin Towers, I’m broken.

To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

Throw a plate.

It’s broken, right?

Say “sorry” to it.

Did it fix back?

No... that’s the same thing you did to me :)

What has 2 or 3 hands and is always right twice a day when it is broken?

A clock.

What did the rapper say to his broken pencil?

"You're just not SHARP enough for my lyrics!"

What did the rapper say to his broken refrigerator?

"Yo, chill!"

I broke my arm in two places. You know what the doctor told me? Stay out of those places!

What are the similarities between a broken tire and me?

We were both caused by broken rubber.

I'd make a joke about corn, but it's too corny.

Then again, I could make a joke about eyes, but that would be even cornea. My funny bone is broken. I guess it was because those jokes were too humerus.