Body jokes

What did the chicken say when he saw a human running around uncontrollably?

"It's running around like a chicken with its head cut off!"

Take a water bottle, shake it, you got piss.

People are fighting in a war, and a man gets hit four times in the arm and says, "'Tis but a scratch!"

And the other guy, looking at him in shock, says, "A scratch? Your arm is off your body!"

When you go to the priest's basement, you will always find the pope's body and his children in the corner of the room.

Why did the skeleton never get cold? Because it went right through him!

How much did the liver weigh?

It weighed a skeleTON.

Your head so big you can wash a big TV on it!

What’s weaker than a daffodil? Mundy’s ankles.

How do you make a tissue dance?

You put a little boogie in it.

Big butt

Could it be ligma?

Ligma balls, daddy!

What goes in and comes out and makes you feel good but isn't sexual?

(Insulin)

I've done a skele-TON of work to think of this joke. Trust me, I've got a FEW more jokes!

What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?

The taste!

I tried my best to think of some puns, but I'm gonna have tibia honest: I don't have any puns left, but I'm pretty sternum, so I'll think of a few puns here and there. It took a lot of spine to do this.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" Not Sally.

How do skeletons talk to each other? By the telebone.

What did the elephant say to the naked man?

"It's nice, but can it pick up peanuts?"

If you're feeling numb, use your thumb.

I once met a skeleton. I asked if I could tell him a joke. He agreed. I told it to him. He found it quite “humerus”.