Body Part jokes
Armless child: Can you give me a hand??
Me: Ok.
What did the one-handed man have for breakfast this morning?
Finger food.
What do you call a murderer with two butts? An assassin.
A man walks into a bar with an alligator and a stick. He walks up to the bartender and offers to put on a show for the bar's patrons in exchange for a drink. The bartender agrees, so he pulls down his pants, sticks his dick in the alligator's mouth, and starts whacking it with the stick. After he's done and gets his drink, he asks if anyone else would like a go.
A lady gets up and says yes, she would like a go, asks that he doesn't hit her with the stick.
Why use Heathrow when we have your forehead?
Why did I giggle?
Because I saw the ocean's bottom.
A man lost his toe when he dropped a knife on it.
Doctor: "I have good news and bad news."
Guy: "What's the bad news?"
Doc: "They replaced your toe with a piece of candy."
Guy: "Good news?"
Doc: "You now have tic tac toe."
Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that always comes out of your mouth?
I wish I was a toe because I want to be banged all day.
No. Eat my butt!
Despite my devilish attitude, I have the heart of a small boy.
I keep it in a jar on my desk.
There was a doctor's room filled with 20 women, 4 kids, 15 men, and 1 dog. However, there were forty foreheads. How is this possible?
(They will think 44 heads, not 40 foreheads.)
Because there are 40 foreheads, not 44 heads.
What's green and smells like pork? Kermit's finger.
Me: Wanna hear a joke about my chin?
Friend: Nah, dude. It'll be too long.
What's the difference between your jokes and your penis? Nobody laughs at your jokes.
What do you call someone with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
Up your pp with a piece of crap!
Did you hear about the streaker in church? He was caught by the organ.
What's the difference between a grape, an apple, and an arm? You don't slice a grape.
What body part do pigs have that humans don’t have?
A hambone.