Body Part jokes

Mooning is very astrological!

What has two legs and is red all over?

Half a cat.

Your forehead's so big that Michael Jackson could moonwalk across that b*tch.

What’s the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby?

Dogs only lick peanut butter off private parts.

What is the last thing that goes through a fly's head when it hits the windshield?

Its butt.

What did one buttcheek say to the other buttcheek?

"Keep this shit between you and me."

What did one butthole say to the other?

"I don't know WHAT got into me last night!"

What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with boobs?

One's a crusty bus station and one's a busty crustacean.

The 6th-grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, “Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?”

No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, “You should not be asking sixth-graders a question like that! I’m going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!”

Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, “Which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?”

Little Mary’s mouth fell open. Then she said to those around her, “Boy, is she going to get in big trouble!”

The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, “Anybody?”

Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, “The body part that increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye.”

Mrs. Parks said, “Very good, Billy,” then turned to Mary and continued.

“As for you, young lady, I have three things to say: One, you have a dirty mind. Two, you didn’t read your homework. And three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed.”

What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?

Roberto.

I wish I was a toe because I want to be banged all day.

Why did I giggle?

Because I saw the ocean's bottom.

What’s the similarity between your uncle and your hands?

They can both do dirty things.

What do you call a man with a curly toe?

Carlito.

Have you heard of Imagine Dragons (the band)? Imagine dragging these nuts across your face.

You sat on a chair with Uranus.

What do you call a woman with one leg?

Eileen.

I've been told I've got a perfect cock.

She sure was hard on me when I took it from her, though.

What has four legs and one arm?

A rottweiler at a park.

What’s the difference between a Rubik's cube and a penis? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.