Biology jokes
What did the math acorn say when it grew up?
"Gee-I'm-a-tree."
What do you call a fly without wings? Dead.
What does a pregnant lady and pigs have in common?
They're both fat.
How do you get a hippy pregnant?
Cum on her feet and let the flies do the rest.
What do you call an annoyed octopus?
Octopissy.
Why does Mario eat mushrooms?
Because he's a very fungi!
What do you call a fish with no parents?
An orfin.
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh.
What did the fish say to the other fish?
"I want my life to be H2O-ver!"
What is a difference between a tree and...
Why did the sperm cross the road?
To fuck the chicken.
Daughter: So, I got my period.
Mom: That's wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying!
Daughter: That's nice, Mum, but isn't the whole point of getting your period dying?
Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to another day.
Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically.)
Mom: You're welcome, honey. (Clueless, obviously.)
Me: What is the difference between your mom and a mosquito?
Friend: Let me guess, they both suck you.
What do a moose and a triceratops have in common?
Both have noses.
Why did the bat cross the road? Because to get to the blood bar.
I fed some chickens some eggs. They ate them. Nothing else to explain except they are cannibals.
What do you get if you cross a zebra and a donkey?
Zeedonk.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fffffsshhhhhh
What did the cell say when it was dividing?
"It's not you, it's me."