Biology jokes
What did the fish say to the other fish?
"I want my life to be H2O-ver!"
What is a difference between a tree and...
Your gene pool is so shallow, you could break your neck diving in.
What’s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can’t hear an enzyme.
Daughter: So, I got my period.
Mom: That's wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying!
Daughter: That's nice, Mum, but isn't the whole point of getting your period dying?
Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to another day.
Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically.)
Mom: You're welcome, honey. (Clueless, obviously.)
After seeing you sing, the dog got disinfected from rabies.
You call me a prostitute's son, I call you test-tube babies.
I fed some chickens some eggs. They ate them. Nothing else to explain except they are cannibals.
What do you get if you cross a zebra and a donkey?
Zeedonk.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fffffsshhhhhh
What did the cell say when it was dividing?
"It's not you, it's me."
Why did the bat cross the road? Because to get to the blood bar.
What do a moose and a triceratops have in common?
Both have noses.
Me: What is the difference between your mom and a mosquito?
Friend: Let me guess, they both suck you.
There were three babies in a mom's stomach. One baby asks, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" The other baby answers, "A doctor. I want to help people. What about you?"
"I want to be an engineer. I want to make things. What about you?" he asks to the third baby.
"I want to be a hunter."
"Why?" the other babies ask.
"I want to kill the snake that spits on my face."
What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his foot?
Mitosis!!! (my-toe-sis)
What does a grape do if a rhino is about to squash it?
Nothing, it just lets out a little wine.
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles.
What type of bees give milk?
Boob-bees.
On Paxomedy channel, I made a video of a Rooster and a dog fighting.
I needed to know why they were fighting. Once I dug down into the issue, it turned out that the Dog called the Rooster a Cock, and the Rooster laughed and called the Dog a useless Bitch, and that was the beginning of their fight, and weird enough, the Cock won!
I went to congratulate the winner, but he thought he was insulting me by calling me Zinjathropus, but I said that was a compliment because Zinja was an old skeleton found in Africa, and I am African. I said to the Rooster he shouldn't have fought with the dog just because he called him a Cock. He said that being called a Cock is a compliment, and the fighting was his exercise to toughen up for serious fights with Dogs!
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
because skeletons aren't alive and can't move, so it's impossible for him to cross the road.