Biology jokes
"Where do young trees go to learn?"
"Elementree school."
Q: What kinda bees give milk?
A: Boobees.
The emo girl in my class did her photosynthesis project on a tree. Little did she know that would be her demise later on.
How do you get a hippy pregnant?
Cum on her feet and let the flies do the rest.
Why does Mario eat mushrooms?
Because he's a very fungi!
What do you call a fish with no parents?
An orfin.
What is the toughest part of the human body?
Anal hair, all the shit that they go through.
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
What do you call an annoyed octopus?
Octopissy.
What does a pregnant lady and pigs have in common?
They're both fat.
What do you call a fly without wings? Dead.
Don't you feel an empty feeling...
IN YOUR SKULL!
Your gene pool is so shallow, you could break your neck diving in.
Daughter: So, I got my period.
Mom: That's wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying!
Daughter: That's nice, Mum, but isn't the whole point of getting your period dying?
Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to another day.
Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically.)
Mom: You're welcome, honey. (Clueless, obviously.)
What do you get if you cross a zebra and a donkey?
Zeedonk.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fffffsshhhhhh
What did the cell say when it was dividing?
"It's not you, it's me."
What do a moose and a triceratops have in common?
Both have noses.
Why did the bat cross the road? Because to get to the blood bar.
After seeing you sing, the dog got disinfected from rabies.
You call me a prostitute's son, I call you test-tube babies.