Bear jokes
Which scary movie did the bear refuse to watch?
The Bear Witch Project.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. It's not dead, just afraid to move.
Why was the Koala Bear so clever?
Because he had good koalifications!
What do you get when you cross breed a bear with a retarded person?
A feminist (a hairy and brainless beast).
What is the difference between a brown bear and a polar bear?
About a few thousand miles.
Memes
Explain Bear is my favorite.
If I ever find the doctor who screwed up my limb replacement surgery... I’ll kill him with my bear hands.
Look for the Gummy Bear album in stores on November 13th, with lots of music, videos, and extras!
I once had a patient who wanted to change his species.
I'll tell you, he was unBEARable.
How do you make a little girl cry for a second time?
By wiping her blood off your dick with her teddy bear.
A mouse is just like a ball bearing.
Drench them in oil, and they stop squeaking.
Why can't Pooh Bear catch a date?
Because he is always talking about his honey.
Daddy bear said, "Somebody's been sleeping in my bed!"
Mummy bear said, "It was probably your whore, Linda!"
What's Momma bear's favorite baseball team? The Cubs.
I love you, Explain Bear. Please bear my children.
How do you catch a polar bear?
Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.
Kermit the Frog and Fozzie Bear were having a picnic.
Fozzie said, "Do you know where Ms. Piggy is? I haven't seen her all day."
Kermit said, "I don't know, but this extra bacon cheeseburger sure tastes great."
No matter how lonely you get, you have Explain Bear.
Explain Bear is always there for you.
What do you do when you run out of carpets? Fetch your shotgun and look for Explain Bear.
In the Robocide, Explain Bear is the first to go.