Beach Jokes

A man is lying on the beach, wearing nothing but a cap over his crotch. A woman passing by remarks, "If you were any sort of a gentleman, you would lift your hat to a lady." He replies, "If you were any sort of a sexy lady, the hat would lift by itself."

why was the sand wet? because the sea weed!

Police arrested a man who dropped his phone in the ocean. The was charged with a salt in battery.

"Hey, hey Spongebob! Water you doing?" [laughs]

"Just looking all my coins with my metal detector because beach better have my money!" [laughs]

"How much have you found so far?"

"Y'know what, I'm not really shore!" [laughs]

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side LOL

me: i have depression

someone: u should get out more! go outside

me: *goes to the beach* now its a tropical depression

Why couldn't a lifeguard save the hippie? -- Because he was too far out man.

Why did Sally get to go to Hawaii for free?

She washed up on the beach.

Where did the cow go on his first date, to the moovies

a blond, a red head, and brunette, were stuck on an island, and the closest populated island was 100km away, so in turn they try to swim to the island, the brunette swims 10 km then drowns, the red head swims 30 km then drowns, the blond swims 50 km then gets tired so she swims back.

What do you call a rejected guitarist who now lives on the beach?

A sea minor.

what did the ocean say to the other ocean. nothing he just WAVED. did you SEA what I did there. GUY: yes are you SHORE

Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay they would be called bagels.

I had a dream of swimming in an ocean of orange soda guess it is just a FANTAsea.

Why did the Ocean Wave? It wanted to say Hi Tide

do you have a sunburn or you just always this hot

I told a Seal a joke it went like "Why did the kid cross the playground" he said "why?" I said "To get to the other slide" and then he said "thats the sealiest thing Ive ever heard"