Bathroom

Bathroom Jokes

Prank

So this guy thought he was funny by pissing on the floor and not in the urinal.

Later on, I guess some kid ran into the bathroom because, well, he probably had to go, but yeah, he slipped and fell and hit his head on the urinal, so all in all it was a pretty good prank on his part.

Canadian

If you're Canadian in the kitchen, then what are you in the bathroom?

European.

Masturbation

Little Johnny’s father walks into the bathroom and catches him masturbating. He says, “Son, every time you do that, you kill an innocent baby.”

The next day, his father walks into the bathroom and catches him again. Johnny says, “Bow your head, Dad. Can’t you see we’re having a funeral?”

Butthole

What did buttholes say after taking a dump?

Buttholes say what a good diarrhea dump.

Birthday

There was this man, and he forgot about his wife's birthday. She was very upset and said that her present should come as fast as 1-200 by tomorrow. When she woke up, she saw a present in the bathroom. It was a scale.

Blood

So little Johnny was walking to the bathroom, and he said, "Grandma," said, "why is the blood coming out of your ###😥 I need to call help."

Toilet Paper

Question: Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?

Answer: Because there was a... crack in it!!!! HAHAHAHAHA! :)

American

If you enter the bathroom as an American and leave the bathroom as an American, what are you in the bathroom?

A European.

Ball

My boyfriend and I were playing baseball last night with some of our friends. Halfway through the game we took a break and he asked me to hold his balls for him whilst he went to the toilet.

All our friends were shocked when I went into the boys' bathroom with him.

Poop

POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!

Job

Toothbrush: I think I have the worst job ever.

Toilet paper: Ya, right.

Glory Hole

Why can't a woman find a glory hole inside of the lady's room?

Because piss comes out of a woman's pussy.

Constipation

What do you tell your butt cheek when you need to use the bathroom? "Hold it in, so you won't get constipated and die."

Toilet

Ni tshike mbangi bcz ani zaha toilet, nikarhi Ni hlometela out side loko tiniba. Ni hlometela ndzeni ka poto.

Pee

Why are you sitting down to pee? I don't have a good back and can't lift something big.